Start Here: 9 Lessons for Women Building a Better Life

The Weekly Brew (or maybe now... Monthly?)

Okay, so I’ve kinda abandoned the Weekly Brew. And while I’ve got a long list of valid reasons to justify it, the truth is I figured since I don’t have a huge audience yet, no one would notice. Right?

Which opens the door to a whole other conversation about commitment, accountability, and consistency... but that’s for another brew. For now, I’m making an executive decision and switching it up to The Monthly Brew. That’s a pace I can realistically keep while juggling all the hats I wear. As I get better at managing everything and the community grows, I may ramp it up again. But for now grace over grind.

Quick housekeeping:
If you’re interested in personal growth and community, join us live on TikTok every Wednesday at 1 PM EST (@weregonnaneedmorecoffee). Bring your drink of choice, come as you are, and let’s support one another while building something meaningful.

Now, onto this month’s topic.

This week I shared a few thoughts on social media, life lessons I wish I knew back in the day. To be honest, it’s not always that I didn’t know... I just didn’t think it was important to listen. So if you're younger and reading this, I hope you’re less stubborn than I was and if you’re older, maybe you’re still healing from them and you’ll probably nod along.

1. Get to know God for yourself.
Not through fear. Not through shame. Not because someone scared you into it. Know Him through relationship. Ask real questions. Learn His character. Trust him always.

2. Don’t wait to start good habits.
Discipline is easier to build than to repair. Start small, whether it’s with money, health, mindset, or your daily rhythm. Consistency > intensity.

3. Moisturize and wear sunscreen every single day.
I don’t care how oily it makes your skin look (trust me). You’ll thank yourself later. Your face and neck need love. It’s not about anti-aging it’s about taking care of yourself and having no regrets due to negligence later.

4. Save money even when you feel broke.
Saving $10 out of $100 builds more character than saving $1,000 when you're comfortable. Don’t wait until you “have more.” Build the habit now.

5. Know why you’re making your choices.
Do you want it? Or did someone make it look good? Let your decisions come from desire, not pressure, trends, or other people’s timelines.

6. Love isn’t just vibes.
It’s work. Real love requires thoughtfulness, mutual respect, and selflessness. There’s a difference between compromise and self-abandonment. Don’t confuse the two.

7. Be mindful of who you have children with.
The idea is to be together forever but things happen and no matter what this person becomes a permanent part of your life. Think beyond the romance. What kind of parent will they be?

8. You’re not running out of time.
You’re evolving. Growth takes time. Some things are better built slowly. Don’t rush but don’t sleep on yourself either.

9. Rest is necessary.
You don’t have to burn out to prove you’re serious. You’ll be more effective with boundaries than without.

Big sisters, what would you add?
Drop it in the comments, send a DM, or join our next live.

5 Realizations That Will Change How You See Life

As we get older, certain truths start to settle in, things that seem so obvious, yet carry so much weight once we really understand them. Here are five realizations that can shift your perspective and bring more meaning to the everyday:

1. You Can Exist Without Proving Yourself.
For too long, we tie our worth to what we achieve or how others perceive us. But here's the truth: you don’t have to hustle for your value. You don’t have to justify your existence to anyone. You can simply be and that’s enough.

2. One Size Doesn't Fit All.
We spend so much time comparing our lives to others, convinced there’s a right way to do things. But life isn’t one-size-fits-all. What works for someone else might not work for you, and that’s exactly how it’s meant to be. Embrace your own path, even if it looks different.

3. Busy Doesn’t Mean Fulfilled.
It’s easy to conflate productivity with purpose. But just because your schedule is packed doesn’t mean your life is full. True fulfillment is found in meaning, not just movement.

4. If You Want to Live Your Best Life, You Have to Let Go of What’s Holding You Back.
Whether it’s self-doubt, toxic relationships, or outdated dreams, holding on to what no longer serves you is like dragging dead weight. The life you want is on the other side of letting go.

5. You Can Outgrow People and Still Love Them.
Growth doesn’t always mean leaving people behind in bitterness. Sometimes, it means loving them from a distance, recognizing that your paths are diverging, and that’s okay.

These realizations aren’t just meant to be read they’re meant to be lived. The sooner we accept them, the more freely we can move through life, unburdened by expectations that were never ours to carry.

What’s one realization you’ve had that completely changed how you view life?

Redefining Fulfillment: Who’s Dream Are Your Living?

They say age brings wisdom. Well, at my age, I’m learning that a lot of the things I thought I wanted were shaped by what I thought I should have wanted. I didn’t realize it back then, but I was chasing ideals that weren’t even mine. It’s easy to think you’re moving forward when you’re really just checking boxes.

But what happens when you get there? When you achieve the things you thought you wanted and it still feels like it’s not enough or something is missing? I think we have to accept that even as we get older and understand this, we can still, at some capacity, feel unfulfilled. I believe it’s part of human nature, to always want more. We tend to get over things quickly. We’re insatiable. But that’s a conversation for another coffee chat.

So, how do we make sure we’re not just chasing things for the sake of it? How do we stop living out other peoples version of fulfillment or success and start defining it for ourselves? I think it comes down to three things:

Understanding What You Really Want
For the longest time, I didn’t stop to think if what I wanted was what I actually wanted, or just what I’d been conditioned to want or I saw it and thought “I need that too!”. Listening to others isn’t inherently bad, there’s wisdom in community and guidance. But I never took the time to ask if it aligned with who I was or what God wanted for me. That pause is where you make room for dicsernement. Sometimes, you have to step back and really ask, Whose dream am I chasing?

Taking a Beat Before You Leap
The world is loud. Everyone has an opinion on what you should be doing. But before you start sprinting toward the next thing, take a breath. Take a beat to ask God if it’s the right step for you. I didn’t always do this. I listened, I followed, I chased but I didn’t pause. I’m learning now that pausing matters. This allows clarity to set in.

Letting Go of Borrowed Dreams
Sometimes you have to let go of what you thought you wanted to make space for what’s actually meant for you. And that’s hard. But I’m learning that fulfillment isn’t found in achieving more; it’s found in aligning with purpose. That might mean rerouting. It might mean starting over. And that’s okay because it is far worse to live a life you dislike at the expense of others who in the end don’t even really care about what that means for you. Let that sink in.

True fulfillment isn’t found in ticking boxes. It’s found in living authentically, discerning God’s voice over the noise, and embracing the unique path designed for you.

Because at the end of the day, the things that matter aren’t always the things we’ve been told to chase.

What would redefining fulfillment look like for you?